The Ramblings from The Clown and Center Stage

Raining Hearts

2007-10-19T13:06:00.000-07:00

What have I seen that could be compared to you?
What have I touched like your hand?
There’s not one thing I wouldn’t do
To feel your touch again.
Jesus, take away the pain.
Com rain in me again.
Wash this soul clean
So all I am is yours;
It’s you I adore.

Lift Him up, lift Him up
Raise your hands and Lift Him up
Bless His name with endless praise.
He’ll rain down mercy and grace.
Praise the Glory of our God
Praise His wonderful works.
Let him rain down raining Hearts of Joy for you and me.
Lift Him up

What have I seen that could be compared to you?
What have I touched like your hand?
There’s not one thing I wouldn’t do
To feel your touch again.
For you are God
And God you are alone.
Holy, majestic, you are Lord
And all I am is yours.
It’s you alone I adore.

You saw who I was and you loved me like Your son
So what now can I do But give Glory and Praise to you!

They Steal a kiss and run Away...

2007-10-11T10:09:00.000-07:00

Open hearts engage each other to fill a need; a vacancy.
Oh, how he says the way he loves her
And then she’s his. For a time as this
When friends become lovers and ruin a good thing.
They say, “We need each other. Don’t you see?”

Why can’t they see the heartache
They’ll produce in each other?
When they hang up dry
After giving themselves away?
Pieces of your heart
Stay with past lovers
And there’s no getting it back
For the one who will stay by your side.

A sweet kiss passed through lips
May send your mind momentarily to the sky.
To walk on clouds, but when clouds come down
They rain on your parade.
Though you think you’re in love, patience is a virtue.
‘Cause what happens if that guy or girl’s not for you?

Can you see yourself held accountable for the actions you’ve done?
If God came down to call his bride home,
would you be found blameless and pure to be his bride for life?

Because if not, there is forgiveness and grace.
Won’t you let him take the place
Of the person you think should
Be your love for good?
And let him be the one - be the one who finds your mate?
Because he loves you more than you could take.
And he wants more than someone who will simply
Appreciate you without love.

Every standard I can't Live up to Be

2007-10-05T17:07:00.000-07:00

What's this life
if I can't find
A way to break free of the humiliating
broken thoughts I try to keep?
What's this life
if I can't have
one or two escapes from this losing person I am?

Maybe the standards set by me.
could never hold up to who I am to be.
For I am nothing of who I want to be.

I want to be the one to leave my body to fly.
I want to be one to sail the ships across the sky.
Fairy tales are much more interesting
than dealing with the reality.
Why can't I be more
than what I'm current'y?

Day by day,
night by night,
I push harder and faster
and farther than my last stride.
But still it's I
who's losing sight.

Maybe the standards set by me.
could never hold up to who I am to be.
For I am nothing of who I want to be.

I want to be the one to leave my body to fly.
I want to be one to sail the ships across the sky.
Fairy tales are much more interesting
than dealing with the reality.
Why can't I be more
than what I'm current'y?

Being friends Is the Hardest thing Ever

2007-09-20T19:18:00.000-07:00

If it seems like I'm pushing you away, it's not personal.
It's me, not you.
I can't bear to have you see me this way and what I'm going through.
It's me, not you.
Cause it hurts so much to know that I
don't have strength to push back.
Every time I close my eyes I feel
tears coming back

It's not your fight
But you want to fight
I can' let you in on my life.
You clench your fists
and say, "We will get through this"
But I can't see why you try
To help me gain my life.

I get caught with the gun im my hands.
This sin I'm going through
Is me, not you.
The stain of blood still covers me,
what do I do?
Forgive me, I've lost you.
The pain that you go on through
Is what hurts me most.
You cover your face from my disgrace,
You accept my blows.

It's not your fight
But you want to fight
I can' let you in on my life.
You clench your fists
and say, "We will get through this"
But I can't see why you try
To help me gain my life.

Your release your fists
and in times like this,
I see the holes in your hands.

My blood is in your hands.

Untitled

2007-09-01T17:00:00.001-07:00

All of me is what you see:
A broken heart, some shattered dreams.
5 harsh blows across my back.
A losing life I thought I had
to control. I'm letting go
of everything that I hold.
All of me, all of me,
I'm giving back to you.

Here's my dreams,
Here's my fears.
Here's my pain,
Here's my tears.
Here's my heart,
Make it yours.
I want to be what I was born
to be.

This is what, what I am:
A cheating dog, a lying man.
I'm sorry for the words I spoke
that peirced your heart with wounding blows
that brought the tears to your eyes.
It is now I realize
That everything I could be
would never amount to what you want me to be.

Here's my dreams,
Here's my fears.
Here's my pain,
Here's my tears.
Here's my heart,
Make it yours.
I want to be what I was born
to be.

Why don't you take my hand
and lead my from this sin I love.
Why don't you steal my heart again?

What is There beyond this World?

2007-08-29T16:04:00.000-07:00

Are you a dream? - it's just a question.
Because everything seems to be
falling to pieces in my life.
Do you hold the world in your hands?
Were you there for me in time to hear
my every call, my every fall?
I'm reaching out grasping at air.
Was it your grasp I felt?

Because I am standing on the edge now,
looking over the side of this cliff.
I spread out my arms and
I am hoping there is someone to lift -
To lift me from my pain,
To help me live my life again,
Are you there for me?

Are you for real - why would you want me?
I am ugly, nothing worthy
Of the attention you give me.
Why are you so amazing?
Everything you have told me,
is hard to believe. Why would you
come to earth and die for me?
What's this love you have shown me?

Because I am standing on the edge now,
looking over the side of this cliff.
I spread out my arms and
I am hoping there is someone to lift -
To lift me from my pain,
To help me live my life again,
Are you there for me?

Everything I could want -
All the world offers,
pulls me down, drags me out,
runs me in the ground.
I believe you are the one!
I believe you are the one!
So here I am, all of me.
I am laying down everything
And going after you -

Because I am standing on the edge now,
looking over the side of this cliff.
I spread out my arms and
I am hoping there is someone to lift -
To lift me from my pain,
To help me live my life again,
Are you there for me?
Cause here I am, all of me
I am laying down everything
and going after you!

Whisperings through Tears

2007-08-27T16:27:00.000-07:00

A partnerless dance across the floor -
I bow to my shame and I give it one more
Waltz through the room and back here again.
I fall on my knees and I forget to pretend
You should be mine, by my side -
Who did I think I was fooling?
All my life, with the lies
That you would have room enough for me.

The tears fall again....
And they cry,
"Look at the rain. Can you feel my sorrow;
Can you feel my pain?
When does it stop, when does it end?
When does my heart have a chance to heal up again?"

I give my fingers a dance across these strings,
As I sit here and imagine you listening to me.
A wrong note is struck; the dream is gone.
It packed it's bags, headed out, and took you along.
What did I do wrong, to push you along
And far away from me?
Did I say the wrong words - words that did hurt?
Should I have even put you in my dreams?

The tears fall again....
And they cry,
"Look at the rain. Can you feel my sorrow;
Can you feel my pain?
When does it stop, when does it end?
When does my heart have a chance to heal up again?"

My tears fall, I fall
Far into oblivion.
It is my fault
Oh, God when will the healing begin?
When will it be time,
to put her chapter behind -
To put her chapter behind the back of my mind?

"until Death do us Part" I Should Say Not

2007-08-23T14:04:00.000-07:00

Come, the night is young -
We got our whole lives ahead of us.
Why don't you take my hand,
And let me lead you in this dance?
Let be your partner,
I am everything you need.
Pull down the dirty canvas of past loves,
That are covering the picture of me

What is this love I lost so willingly?
I gave you my heart,
I gave you my dreams
We were young and we were free,
But now that I am older,
I just seem to accept this reality

Every little moment
We spent together in the sun
Who knew years down the road,
you and I would end up so far from -
From we thought we'd grow up to be
But now we are like all the others
But my feelings still follow you, you see
I've given my heart to no other,
But I've kept it for you and me

What is this love I lost so willingly?
I gave you my heart,
I gave you my dreams
We were young and we were free,
But now that I am older,
I just seem to accept this reality

And now you're mine -
I see you walking down the aisle,
The veil hanging in your face;
The flowers in your hands
the smile on your face...
Then I wake up
to find me standing alone
Next to the picture
of you and me together.
Oh, How we were young! -
and foolishly in love.
But that never stopped us from,
Giving our hearts to help the needy,
I close my eyes - I see you, sweety,
Standing next to Jesus, calling me home.
Two of my truest loves - calling me home.